Curtis Klingle

Leaving a Mark

A couple of months ago a friend asked me to pray for one of her friends who was battling cancer. About two weeks later I met this most remarkable woman, Ms. Sherri, and her sweet husband Darryl. I also learned that Ms. Sherri had been at war with the disease for two and half years. Our short visit lasted only three hours, during which we had wonderful conversations and I listened to her talk about her relationship with Christ. I remember her saying that she wanted to live long enough to bring her family to God.

Her faith was authentic as well as enthusiastic, and she exuded love. I recalled my friend Cristi telling me about how when they first met many years ago, there was an immediate bond between them. Sherri took her in like family and poured love out upon her.

This Friday morning, I had just returned from my walk and saw that I had a message. Ms. Sherri passed in the wee hours of the morning. On this day, August 16, 2024, the world dimmed a bit, and I fear it will never be as bright again. I have been grieving as though I have known her for years, and I suspect it will continue for some time. It came to me that it is not the duration of time that we have known someone that matters, it is the quality of that time. I have heard it said that it is not so much what we say, but what we do that impacts others. Actually, it is when what we do lines up with what we say, that is when we see integrity and the genuineness of the person. It is then that they impact us.

I have known some people for years that have never entered my heart. We all have these people in our lives, many are even family, those that we never get to know, the ones who don’t affect us to any great degree. I find it odd that I have never let them in, but as I think about it, I discover that it is this lack of integrity and genuineness that I sense in them which inhibits my ability to draw close. Without integrity, I believe we will be and probably should be somewhat wary.   

We each have encounters with people like Ms. Sherri. Some are there for a few minutes, some for a season, and some for a lifetime. One of my earliest memories of one of these special people was a science teacher named Mr. Gibson. He was not the stereotypical science teacher by any means either. When I think of a science teacher, I envision a somewhat wimpy, slender man with a crew cut, clad in a white lab coat, with the gratuitous pocket protector, and this picture is capped off with a pair of thick black rimmed glasses. The dichotomy between this image and Mr. Gibson is stark. Mr. Gibson was a tall, musclebound man of African descent, and he would have been quite at home on any football field as a defensive lineman. This behemoth of a man stood before our class passionately explaining the periodic table, imparting scientific formulas, and describing the wonders of our universe. He touted the benefits of an education focused in the sciences and provided personal attention to those that sought this knowledge. No teacher in 12 years of public education and five more in college, has ever made the impact on me that this man did. He did so by opening his heart and investing his time in me and into countless others.

Many years later I met Jep Fain, who remained my mentor, a father figure, and my best friend until his passing several years ago. Jep had to have been in his early 60s when we met. I had just entered the civilian world again and was adjusting from jumping out of airplanes to the mundane life of a mechanic. I had no idea what I wanted to do in life, other than become an astronaut, and that was unrealistic because, well, I just didn’t have the equipment upstairs for that profession.

Jep, was an old school ID man, an identification officer, the predecessor of the modern crime scene investigator. This old man saw the need and longing for direction in me and took me under his wing. Under his tutelage, I began learning the trade in the crime lab, taking night classes at a junior college, and sometime later, the police academy. All of this was made possible through the love and investment in me that Jep made.

There have been so many to make an impact on me in this life and I could go on and on, listing those who have forever changed me but, for the sake of brevity, I will only mention one more.

I made a dear friend in a little towheaded girl just a couple of years ago. I initially thought that our friendship was a result of me investing my time and sharing my life with her, but I’m not so sure anymore. Actually, as I ponder that, I can say with all confidence that to the contrary, I am receiving the lion’s share of any investment of time. Mercy has taken me on several amazing journeys through the yard behind her home. I am certain that in her child’s mind that this vast expanse is borderless, even though a fence does exist. It is possible that this kingdom goes on infinitely. There have surely been many battles waged over this haven and its inhabitants. On our treks through her kingdom, she has introduced to me to the fairies, the woodland nymphs, and to animals that could speak. She even taught me that in order to witness the full beauty of a flower, you must sneak up on them and surprise them while they are in full display. But, the most memorable lessons I have learned from her are unconditional love and investing myself into another.                    

As I continue to reflect on those that have altered the course of my life, I return to those three hours of Ms. Sherri’s life that were shared with me. At the beginning of this paper, I was hesitant to use that word “only” referring to the three hours I spent with her, because it seemed to diminish the importance of that period of time and the indelible mark she left upon my heart. Please understand, that there were others present, her husband Darryl, Cristi, and her two dogs, but I truly felt that this time was primarily devoted to me. But isn’t it always that way when we are being schooled? It is as if all the doors and windows of the world have been shut, and you are alone with your teacher in that moment, one mind meeting another. I am reminded that we rarely know when we are receiving a life lesson until the moment has passed.

I find that even using the word time in reference to the minutes I was in her presence is a misnomer. Time is an illusion, and that is never more evident than in these moments. We earthly creatures are trapped within time and we are constantly reminded of our bondage. Even with the words we use to describe circumstances in our lives: minutes, hours, years, moments, all of these are measurements of time and are constant reminders of our subjugation. We have no concept of describing events in our lives without them being within the constraints of time. Have you ever noticed how quickly time passes when in the midst of joy, happiness, and laughter? Conversely, how it seems to creep by when we are in worry, or in that darkened state of despair we call grief. Time is relative to the degree that we give it power over us, and it is literally of no consequence when we are immersed in love and living in the moment. After all, what we do in the present is all we have control over.

I think the answer to why Ms. Sherri made such an impact also lies in selflessness. It is almost as if Ms. Sherri, and those rare souls who live selflessly investing themselves into others, are the ones making the greatest impact. They are the ones grabbing the steering wheel of our lives and making those abrupt turns, possibly even turning the thing around. They see something in us and want more for us, thus they give a bit of themselves to help us along the path.

But there is yet one more special attribute unique to Ms. Sherri that I have yet to address, and it is what I would term prima facia evidence of the afterlife. There was something more to her, something you couldn’t quite see, something ethereal, but you could sense it. It is almost as if those that stand on the threshold between here and eternity sometimes display a little more of that other place than they do of this one. Maybe, just for a moment the door to our final destination has been cracked open and we can see it in them? Could it be that unbeknownst to them they are already being clad in their heavenly garb? Maybe they are reflecting that pure Light where no sun is necessary because the refulgency of God’s love permeates everything? I think the answer to these questions is yes, yes indeed.

Thank you, Ms. Sherri.

C. Klingle  

P.S. In reference to the subject of time, the more I learn the more I come to believe that heaven will be like experiencing one continuous “present moment.” We are told as much, “…beloved, do not forget this one thing, that with the Lord one day is as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day.” 2 Peter 3:8.

Take the time to live in the present. Invest in someone else, and with everything you have in you, love.